OI Gaming: Top 5 Scary Majora's Mask Moments

Game Review: Never Dead

*Sigh*

 I try to keep an open mind when it comes to games. I mean, I play a lot of them, and they cant ALL be fantastic. Though, to be perfectly honest I think that's kinda bullshit. If you're going to spend years making a game, why not make it great?

But I digress.

Never Dead is a game released earlier this year by Rebellion Developments. The game is based around a man named Bryce, who was cursed by Astaroth, the King of the Demons, to never die.
 So you can tell the developers really worked hard on the name.
 Bryce now works for the government in modern day, to destroy demons, and get bossed around by a blond. (I cant remember her name because, well, shes really annoying and I hated her by the end of the game.)

The main gimmick of the game is that Bryce dose not die. Instead he loses his arms and legs and even his head. If that happens, you have to roll around to your body parts and *ahem* Pull yourself together.

 You can also pull off your arms and throw them with guns, meaning you can shoot. You cant kill anything, you can just shoot.

There are also puzzles where you pull your head off and use it to solve puzzles. The only problem with that is that there are little monsters that eat your head and if you don't win a quick time event it's game over. Also, Bryce never SHUTS THE FUCK UP when hes a head, and will spout the same lines over and over and over again as you roll around. Seriously, he says the same fucking line every five seconds. "Rollin, rollin, rollin. Hope this doesn't mess up my hair. Ive got a headache."
 SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!

 There are plenty of good game elements here, but they are all handled poorly. You switch form guns, to swordplay...

Wait a minuet... That sounds familiar... Ill think of it, hang on...

Anyway, you fight demons, with a fast pace, with random rock music swelling up whenever the monsters pop up, and then fading to silence when all are... gone... Huh...

OH! I know! Its like Devil May Cry!

I'm serious. This game wants to be Devil May Cry so bad that it hurts. Bryce's character tries to be Dante so hard that it passes the line of homage, and turns into a horrible parody of him.

Never Dead isn't a good game. The voice acting is lame. When the token damsel in distress (who knows NOTHING about Bryce at this time) shouts the line "I HOPE YOU ARE CURSED FOREVER!" I cringe. Seriously? Cant they write like people actually speak?

This game made me want to take a nap after every chapter. And that is never a good thing to say about a game.


Until next time, keep on gaming.

Here's to gaming.

~AZ

AGAIN?!?

 From the desk of the Pissed off Jade Fox:

...

I cant believe Im doing this again... Seriously. Youd think I would have better things to get pissed off about then comercials. But once again here I am with another rant... About a comercial.

RANT TIME 2

Ok, so once again I was watching videos on That guy with the Glasses ( Link here: CLICK ME!!!! I love them)

 and Blip now has commercials at the beginning, middle and END of each video.

 *Sigh*

 Ok, I can deal with that, seeing as it is free content.

Now the ad that has lead me here is for Gamestop (who I also love) and starts by showing a guy on his couch, with cheetos and milk on a stand next to him. He's looking at his game and sees something that, I guess, pleases him? Its a soccer game theyre promoting and I know dick about soccer, so Im guessing that its some good player or something.

But the man is over joyed, and in his glee does a full body... I guess the only word for it is spasm, in which he kicks over the stand, spilling cheetos and milk everywhere. They throw in their gobbledygook about the promotion, and then it cuts back to the guy just sitting there stunned about the player he saw.

Is this man retarded?

Don't get me wrong... Ive been excited before. I've even jumped up and do a little dance some time. (example) And yes, I have made a mess before. But my reaction afterwords isnt to sit and stare like an idiot at whatever made me happy. Its normally "Oh shit" and then frantecly running around to clean up my mess.

I know that, for comerciles, you should extend your suspension of disbelief, but after seeing it again, and again, and AGAIN, I get pissed at this man every time. Maybe Im the only one... Maybe Im reading too much into it...


But what if Im right?

Here's to "if"


~AZ

Get Psyched Mix

You need to get psyched, I got the mix for you.



1. Dancing with myself- Billy Idol
2. Paradise City- Guns N' Roses
3. You Give Love a Bad Name- Bon Jovi
4. Don't Stop Believing- Journey
5. Dr, Feelgood- Motley Crue
6. Don't Stop Me Now- Queen
7. Round and Round- Ratt
8. Renegade- Styx
9. Rock you like a Hurricane- The Scorpions
10. Thunderstruck- AC/DC
11. Tom Sawyer- Rush
12. I Wanna Rock- Twisted Sister
13. Panama- Van Halen

Youre welcome world ^_^

R

Riddle time.

I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?

Check out my next blog for the answer. ^_^

Here's to thinking.

~AZ

Q

Interactive blog today. I want to know what makes you Quirky?

Leave a comment, I'm interested to hear what comes up. ^_^


Here's to quirkiness.

~AZ